There are certain Taboo subjects that cross nearly all cultural, ethical, moral and religious boundaries. When a woman tells you she has been raped and tortured, and shows you police documentation to verify that, you simply do not challenge her and accuse her of being a filthy, evil liar.
And so for a few more months I continued to have limited contact with Sarah. I told her not to ring me as I would not answer, I was rarely connected to Skype, and after growing tired of seeing her tweet the same old sexually suggestive shit on Twitter asked her to start a new account just for us to communicate so I could stop following @sendTulips.
The account she setup was @greenSkyRedSea, but rather than keep that just for me, she immediately followed 14 other guys, all of whom quickly followed her back. That pissed me off because I knew that there must be a reason for that, and most likely it was that I was part of the lies she was telling these other guys, and she could not be seen to have lost contact with me.
As I began to regain my life, and my sanity I surveyed the damage that the “Molly Episode” had inflicted on my soul and the impact it had on other real people in my life. It had been a dark time in which I never stood a chance against a master manipulator. It was however impossible to avoid the reality that it was my own stupid fault that this had gone on so long.
I have never hated Sarah, I do not now. Nor have I ever wanted to hurt her, and this blog was never intended as revenge. Most of the fondness I felt for “Molly” is long gone, but I do still feel some sympathy for Sarah. To be born without conscience is a cruel fate. Sociopaths may feel they are at an advantage because they DO NOT GIVE A FUCK. ABOUT ANYONE. I can never know how “liberating” that is. Nor do I wish to.
If I could erase this event from my life I would, however as that’s not an option the next best thing to do is to accept what I have learnt about myself, and the world, and move on. I needed one more push to finally do exactly that, because my dumb gene was still singing the “friends forever” tune, and some misguided feeling of obligation was still suggesting my friendship held value.
One day in early December 2011 I checked out @sendtulips recent tweets and saw a very simple “smile” in the direction of the Ginja Ninja, the fake account for Sarahs “ex-boyfriend”, James of Biffy Clyro. There was only one reason Sarah would do that, she was stringing someone else along with recycled bullshit. I got her on Skype audio, and told her to never EVER contact me again.
I could not with 100% certainty rule out the rape story she had told me, but rape or not, I had reached the limits of what I could offer this woman, and what I could tolerate. We have not spoken since, though she has tried calling, and sent me TXT messages, particularly when I first started this Tumblr. There are no words for the relief and sense of freedom I felt having finally removed her from my life…. except for that one small thing.
Quietly tapping me on the shoulder, suggesting that perhaps I should let someone know about this. Whether she was sick, evil, or indeed a victim of a terrible trauma, I should at least let her family know about this. And so in early January I decided to send an email to the man I believed was her brother. I sat down and spent 3 hours drafting an email to him. It was a very brief summary of the series events I have outlined on this Tumblr, which is in itself only a brief summary of the entire saga.
The next day I received a response. Turns out I had it wrong, he was not her brother. He was her ex-husband, and the teenage boy I had occasionally heard in the background during conversations with Sarah was their son. He was not surprised that Sarah was fucking with people, as they had divorced for the very same reason. Endless lies with real world consequences that he had to deal with, as she would not. He was however surprised by the extent that she had gone to, and the insanity of some of her fantasies. He was able to confirm many of my suspicions, most critically the absolute impossibility of her claims of rape and torture.
Both Sarahs ex-husband, and her son wish to distance themselves from Sarahs actions, past, present and future. That is not to say they disown her entirely, they simply wish to make it clear they do not support her behaving in this manner.
Nor any member of the Jauregui family I would imagine. More than one anonymous commentator on this site, claiming the Jauregui name has expressed the desire to have her stripped of the name that she married into, and has by her callous actions, bought into disrepute.
As for the Tweedie family, I have reached out to a number of them. All but one have completely ignored me, something I cannot comprehend, but then again I know very little about this family other than the basic information I found online.
Having removed Sarah from my life, and proven all my suspicions were correct, all that was left was to ask Why?
I have since researched Sociopaths and have a decent understanding of why she, and 4% of the population (1 in 25) are the way they are. She is not sick, nor disabled, rather she lacks one of the core qualities of humanity. I guess I should be thankful she is of the non-violent variety, unlike some of the more well known Sociopaths like Hitler, Charles Manson, and the fictional Hannibal Lecter.
More difficult to answer is why I let this go on for so long. Many times I have offered reasons such as compassion, curiosity, misplaced loyalty etc, all completely honest, but not the whole story. Inexplicably there was also a sense that maybe some of what she told me was true, despite all of the evidence to the contrary. Check out this photo overlay I did when I discovered all Sarahs “sexy time” photos came from a porn site.
WHAT THE FUCK WAS I THINKING??
Fuck I am laughing right now as I type this, and sip on my single malt, but it does rather nicely illustrate the extent to which Sociopaths can get inside your head. Its like a form of hypnotism, and even when you know you are being fucked with, you can find yourself powerless and a little insane.
There’s also no denying Sarah was entertaining to talk with, a sharp and naughty sense of humor. And did I mention shes a great story teller? I wish Molly, the person Sarah created for me, minus the princess, riches, surfer babe bullshit had been real because then I could have kept my “friends forever” promise.
Anyway, quite a number of people have asked “What does she really look like?” So here’s a montage of her many looks.